Today is my wife's birthday. I won't embarrass her by saying how old she is. Let's just say we are still both old enough to know better and still young enough not to do it. I don't think Carol knows how much she means to me, and though I have written some deeply personal blog posts this week, please stay with me.
Carol is not just a mother, a wife and a woman. She is a great friend, intelligent, witty and with a bizarre sense of humour that marries my own. I should listen to her more, and in away she should listen to me more, again old enough to know better but still too young not to do it. However, we are still standing, well Carol stands, I tend to shamble and Little D merely dances everywhere. We are still here because we do communicate. Often these communications take the four letter word philosophical route but I never question whether I love her because I do, unconditionally. The very act of being able to lose your rag with someone close means you love them. Likewise, the ability to bite your tongue when you know all you want to do is give your opinion. I am opinionated, it goes with the territory, if I wasn't would you be reading this now? Carol is opinionated and together our opinions can seem very driven. We are driven people, it is not that we want to be someone; we have no desire for fame (though the fortune wouldn't be turned down), we just have a desire to do better, be better and make a better world. Maybe this comes from our roots, we both grew up with strong families, wonderful loving families but without pots of money. That is why I love my wife, she is not materialistic, she doesn't worry about whether she can have the next big thing (no innuendo, please). It is my wife who in my darkest hour cradled me, kept care of me, loved me. You may think that this is a given in any relationship but I can name so many ex-girlfriends who would have fled the moment they saw me in spasm. Lying here as a lay then, in pain, I have a moment of clarity and I can think of too many ex's who would have left me there on the floor and only Carol who wouldn't have. Carol for me isn't just the one, she is the only one. Carol shows a strength and beauty that cannot be eroded by time. Though both Carol and I will age, this very thing at the centre of Carol's personality will never wane. My wife cares, sometimes too much, and this is why I love her and this is why she saved me from a bleak outlook on life. She showed me that some people care too much and that they are right to do so. Even when I tell her she shouldn't, I am really saying, I wish I could care as much as you do. I do care too much for my wife, and that is a step in the right direction we should all take when we look to the people we love.
Since I scheduled this, Carol has been nominated for the Top 25 European Mums, please scroll down and vote for LIFE ON PIG ROW. You can vote every 24 hours. Let's make my wife smile xx