We have a running battle going on with onions, we have only ever produced enough summer onions to make what was the most tastiest pickled onions we've ever made. We have bemoaned here that we have had problems with summer onions, you may remember that rant: moan, moan, spit, stare you in the eye and tell you to go to hell with summer onions. Yes, that one! You remember now and you may remember that our final flurry into onions was embracing winter ones, we loved them, we raved about them, we spoke too bloody soon. That is the problem with telling everyone about a new thing that works, the god of sod all things hears you, and then gives you sod all. Our sod all came about through what has been one of the mildest, wettest winters on record. The winter onions got off to a great start, real growth, real potential. We had hope, we felt love. Then the god of sod all sat on the soil and compacted it to an inch of it's life. That's not good for onions.
This is our onion patch, miserable isn't it? Look at how flat and tarmac like that soil is, you wouldn't believe how much compost and manure went into this last spring, it looks bitter and cold. Look for those green shoots of recovering onions and you will see sod all. For the god of sod all gives you nothing. Around a hundred onions went in, we planted them in a block system and in a block system they have died. There's no sign of them, they haven't been eaten, they have simply rotted to nothing in what has been a cold, wet soil lashed by rain, lashed by more rain, lashed by some final rain and then dumped on by snow and hail.
Onions! Onions! We have to face a fact! You've done sod all, so pack your bags! We won't be doing onions again, they are off the list, they are ex-onions, they are no more, these onions have flown up to heaven, this is a dead onion! Oh well, maybe leeks will do.